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10 Rules for Resilience by Joe De Sena
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Rating: 9/10
Review: A book packed with practical ideas for your family. Here are 13 of my favorite parts:
- Exercise is hard. Honesty is hard. Eating healthy is hard. Integrity is hard. But also – Obesity is hard. Anxiety is hard. Choose your hard.
- Our utter devotion to what is safe and comfortable is a crack in our foundation. It keeps us from growing. What is the GIFT on the other side of discomfort? A difficult situation is a growth opportunity. Your brain might tell you ‘it’s impossible,’ but that’s wrong. It’s only difficult. You can’t …until you can. Say: I can’t …YET! When you go through something difficult, imagine your brain actually growing.
- Hate is a boomerang. If you spew it toward others, it comes back and creates self-loathing. When in doubt, close your mouth.
- Have your kids name 3 things they are grateful for while you are eating – one person, one place, one thing.
- You can’t control your kid’s athletic ability or how smart they are, but you can control how hard they work. Hard work forges character.
- Give kids responsibilities as soon as they can walk. Increasing the amount of responsibility as they age. You’ll be training them to be capable independent adults.
- Self-agency: The ability to understand that you can make your own choices and that you have some sense of control over what comes next. When kids understand that their choices will create consequences for them, it helps them be more thoughtful and intentional.
- Nature has healing powers. Being in the forest has shown to decrease symptoms of depression and anxiety, and increase cardiovascular health. The best gym is the natural world. The sound of running water steadies us. The air refreshes us. The sunshine cheers us. The raw elements challenge us. We need to get outside and experience this glorious planet with all of our senses.
- Power of Play: You don’t have to do anything fancy to have an outdoor adventure. Go on a hike, play tag in your backyard, climb trees, wrestle on the grass- these all develop their skills. Free play provides tactile feedback that children need to excel in sports later on. Kids need exercise for proper physical development and behavior. Prioritize movement over screen time. Physical activity is essential for healthy brain development. Throw a football, grab a jump rope, or go for a walk in the woods. You’ll see a difference in the behavior and attitude of your children. Especially teenagers! There are amazing benefits to Free Play. Free play not only helps to develop creative resources and enhance imagination, but also aids in the fine-tuning decision-making and problem-solving skills.
- Outdoors is a canvas for the imagination. Outdoor play will help children invent the future. A recent study showed that children ages 5-12 spend less than 30 min outside each day. Prisoners are guaranteed 2 hours a day outdoors. Criminals are getting more outdoor time than our kids. Many studies show that getting exercise outside improves kids brain function.
- On Fear. What’s on the other side of fear is fantastic. Elizabeth Gilbert welcomes fear in the car, but doesn’t let it drive the car. Fear is present, but not in control. Movement cures fear. Fear is just a feeling. Fear and excitement are similar, practically exact feelings. Your feelings are not an accurate measure of what you can handle. Fear is a feeling and does not have control over you. Courage can be learned, bravery can be developed. ‘It’s only my body getting scared. My smart mind knows it will be okay.’ Practice doing something your kids are afraid of. ‘Systematic desensitization’ means repeated exposure conquers fear. Fear will be an ever-present part of life, but it’s not bad. It’s just a signal that we may need to use certain skills to move forward.
- There will always be people who support you and people who criticize. Decide now who you will listen to.
- Growth mindset: praise your kids for EFFORT over intelligence. Say: ‘Wow, you worked hard on that!’ Celebrate the process, not just the product. Highlight how hard they worked and what they learned.
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Screwtape Letters by CS Lewis
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Rating: 9/10
Review: I absolutely love this author and this book was brilliantly written. It gives insight into how the devil might be at work behind the scenes and in our thought lives. He is very subtle and sneaky in his attempt to turn us away from God. This book is absolutely worth reading, and it’s a book you’ll probably want to come back to again and again. The ideas shared in this book will stay with you long after you’ve finished the last page.
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Will by Will Smith
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Rating: 6/10
After reading this book, I wasn’t shocked by what happened at the Oscars for two reasons.
1. After finishing the book, I knew that Will is not in a good place.
2. He’s always struggled with how to defend the women in his life – from his mom, to his daughter, and now his wife. A theme throughout the book was his feeling of shame for not being courageous enough to protect them. He’s obviously still figuring that out.
My Review of the Book:
The beginning of Will’s autobiography was fantastic! Will used his superb storytelling ability to share the challenges of his childhood, how he got into hip-hop, and the crazy story of how he became the Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
However, once he became ‘the biggest movie star of all time” (he reinforced this point many times), the story fell flat.
In spite of success at every level, he still hasn’t found what he’s looking for. He’s searching for peace in all the wrong places (psychedelic drugs, busyness, success, money, women, etc.).
I don’t necessarily recommend the book, however, if you’re a huge Will Smith fan and want to check it out, I recommend the audiobook. Will Smith reads the book and includes sound bites and songs that add an extra dimension. I think you’ll agree that the beginning is interesting, and the end is disappointing. I wish he would have waited to write this book.
Side note: Will’s oldest son, Trey, has found peace in a personal relationship with Jesus. Jesus brings the unconditional love, peace, and fulfillment. For those searching for peace, ask God if He is real and you may find everything that you’ve ever been looking for is right there in Him.
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